Friday, May 6, 2016
Thursday, May 5, 2016
Being a Mom
and in A LOT of ways I'm sure we all have shared meanings.
Some days I think to myself
"Heck! Give me 100 more little mini Jace's running around"
and then of course there are definitely those days that I think to myself
"MOMMMMMM! PLEASE SAVE ME"!
and save me, she does! Why? You may ask. Well simple. Because she's my mom!
Not for the faint of heart, that's one thing I do know.
Sleepless nights, having to make that 'quick' errand run even quicker,
never ending laundry, early mornings and even longer nights, put off naps, summer scrapes and bruises, tears to dry, snacks to be packed, toys to be cleaned, and too many tantrums for one Mom to tackle alone.
"Parenting is so much harder than it looks on Full House"
--never a more true quote!
I love my Son...(going to be TWO sons. Party on!)
In fact, I have never been more proud of anything in my life.
Let me give you an illustration of something that happened to a friend a few weeks ago. Okay okay, fine. It happened to
me not a friend. We were in town, JC Penney's I want to say, and I ran off to the bathroom. If any of you know me, a bathroom trip is seriously a 30 second thing for me. I left my little man babe with my Husband and Mom. When I returned they told me that Kyren had something to show me, a Cheetah Purse. I looked for him to show me and just like that he was gone. I asked where he was and quickly found he wasn't there. Do I put blame on two of the most important people in my life? NO, never. But I tell you this story because it was a turning point for me. A magical, needed, and SO not wanted moment for me to have. I stayed in the same area he had gone missing in. Mom went up front and Jace checked everywhere. After 10 minutes..who knows, maybe even 5 minutes he was found. (The absolute longest, and hated few minutes of my entire life!) On the complete opposite side of the store, talking to a small little boy. Not scared, Not looking for me, and with no idea how badly my Mommy heart was hurting.
Jace handed him to me; I hugged him, I cried, I hugged him tighter.
All of the sudden the time I had spent that morning fighting him to get in the shower and bribing him to eat his cereal. The days I had to put him in his crib, walk out, and take a 20 second breather. The many many car rides that Mr. and I have had to take him on recently just to get him to sleep. Countless hours I've spent on the floor playing with cars, trains, and blocks just to be yelled at because I was playing "wrong". Four Wheeler rides nearly everyday after his nap just to keep him from screaming. Leaving every store with a ball because that's what he wanted and just couldn't live without. Car rides of having to pull over because he just wouldn't have it. That one time he decided to color us a pretty picture all over our Mazda with a rock and the very next day drawing the exact same picture on his Aunt Brina's car. Those times as a little babe that I would have to rock him for an hour and sing him "I have a family here on Earth" over and over again. The head butting, the pinching, the throwing of food, toys, my phone, and even himself on to the ground.
-Those little moments, that sometimes happen all too often...
felt so much like miracles.
He is the luckiest of opportunities. He is the most incredible blessing to me.
Suddenly, I saw very clearly something that I have always known but tend to lose sight of way too often.
It is truly a blessing and a gift to be wanted, to be called for, to be tugged at, pulled on, cried to, cried on, spit up on, laid on, jumped on, sat on, followed around, hugged, kissed, tight squeezed, wanted, and to be the one he needs.
With it being Mother's Day I have thought an extra lot about motherhood. I hope and I pray so badly that I can be the mother that takes time to get on the ground and play with cars, and builds train tracks. That I can be the mom that slides down the slide and plays in the dirt. I hope that I can be the mom that reads just one more story or sings one more song. I hope that I can be the mom that spoils her babies despite what other people think. I hope that I can be the Soccer Mom, Basketball Mom, Baseball Mom, Football Mom, and maybe even Dance Mom. I hope that I can be the mom that holds his (their) hands when they walk to school, that I can be there when they get home, that I can help with homework, and feed them ice cream cones. I hope that I can teach them to be kind, to be loving, to give compliments, to believe in themselves like I do.
I genuinely hope that I can be the mother to them that my sweetest mom has been for me.
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